Jet lagged

This week has been tough for me to grab a hold of. Of course there are things that just get you through and make it worth every moment spent. Peter has been in Afghanistan for a couple of days now and I find it a little easier than the last time he was overseas, social media has made this experience different. What I was expecting was long periods of unknowns, followed by quick phone calls at random times with minutes of greetings. Monday afternoon was one of the highlights of this week. Michael calls me around 3 in the afternoon filled with excitement and talking really fast asking me if I got a phone call from a number I didn't recognize...up to that moment I was having a more than exhausting day and I wasn't sure what Michael was up too. But he told me it was Peter and that he is going to call me soon. Wow, I thought Peter is calling already, I was almost skeptical, because I couldn't help but compare my experience from before to my expectations....needless to say I was pleasantly surprised that it was him. Talking to him felt so good, he told me that he was jet lagged and that it was 3:40 in the morning in Afghanistan...before that moment I didn't really care or even think about Afghanistan, it was almost fictional, but as soon as he called me it became a real place with oh very real people to me. He sounded good, almost relieved; he mentioned that it was nice, not as bad as he had expected...not sure what that means because I can't imagine what he expected. But it made me feel good to hear his voice and to know that he was doing good. I can't wait for the next time I get to talk to him and see him on skype. Believe it or not I still remember the number we used to contact him in Germany 011491701502991 I kid you not that was the number I dialed many many times for my parents almost 8 - 10 years ago, that number means nothing now but it is something that I never forgot, this time his number will always be different, as he joked about all the telemarketers I am going to talk to, thinking it is him, I still felt good knowing that once in a while it will be him.

I Got this picture today from Peter's facebook page, he posted it today! I love social media for giving me the opportunity to keep up with my brother and see him while he is away. LOOKING GOOD PETER!!!!!

Off and Away!

Yesterday was Peter's last day in the States. His phone is shut off and we have no way of contacting him. I don't know why but I feel lonely knowing I can't contact him. It's all becoming too real too soon. He called me yesterday as he was boarding to say goodbye and to tell me he will contact me as soon as he can...what does that mean? How long would I have to wait before we struggle to make small talk? I love my brother so much and I don't like the fact that I can't pick up the phone and call him. This morning I thought that I might be different, that I might actually be the one who gets him on the phone if I called...! I did get an update today, he checked in to Germany for a layover, which is slightly confusing because i thought he had a direct flight. Peter started out his Army career stationed in Germany for almost three years, that how I learned to cope and that's where the changes of who he is to day began to show, so I find it quiet fitting that he would stop there; I know when he reads this he will roll his eyes at me trying to make such a big deal out of his layover, and I can almost hear him make a joke about me trying too hard, but I am not trying and this is a big deal. Peter has always tried to make things appear miniscule, like they are not a big deal even his goodbyes are as if he is going on a cruise or something. I don't mind that about him because I know it is his way of trying to protect me and everyone else from feeling something with more depth, I know he doesn't want us to cry or get all emotional with him because frankly he just doesn't know how to handle that, and i do my best to be as non emotional as I possibly can, but I know that deep down he knows that me saying goodbye to him yesterday as he was boarding a plane to go to Afghanistan, while I was watching Annabelle in her gymnastics class, was by far one of the hardest things I had to do. For one I don't nor will I believe that it is the last time I will talk to him, because I know I will. I just wish that I didn't have to relinquish all control. I guess some of you might think I am and as much as I try to resist acknowledging that I am a control freak, I just like to know that I have the ability to tell my brother I love him anytime I want, and this morning I couldn't, the automated message I got after casually dialing his phone number told me so. Is this going to be hard YES! is it going to be harder on him? NO DOUBT! but I know that we will all get through this. Peter had a message: "Don't pay too much attention to the news!" and while that is easier said than done, I will do my best not too. Until next time. Support one another regardless of your beliefs.

Introduction

Saying goodbye is never easy, especially not to my brother. I am a proud little sister to a 1st Lieutenant in the United States Army who will be leaving to Afghanistan in three days. I decided to open this blog as an outlet for me to express how I feel being home with my family and friends, knowing where he is. I am extremely proud of him and all his accomplishments and I couldn't think of a better way to share stories and updates about his adventure.